“She scares me,” said the little boy peering up at the Richard Avedon photo of Björk. Then he turned and looked around the entire room of portraits. “These people just don’t smile.”
Archive for the ‘Overheard’ Category
Weird Pixar-type thing
November 28, 2009“I want to watch this movie sometime, but I can’t remember what it is.” The man at the bar gestured up at the silent television overhead. “It’s weird. About robots.”
“Transformers?” asked the girl, though what was on the screen was animated.
“No,” he said. “It’s some weird Pixar-type thing.”
Wishful thinking
October 28, 2009“You mentioned you were a magician,” said the defendant, who was representing himself.
“No, musician,” said the potential juror. “If I was a magician, I’d disappear right now.”
“Can you take me with you?” asked the judge.
It’s not as good as SCUBA
October 26, 2009“Snorkeling,” he said.
“Snorkeling?” she said.
“Come on,” he said. “You still have to hold your fucking breath.”
Bus stop, Telegraph and Grand
September 30, 2009“Where’s your shoes, sister? You’re going to get gangrene on your feet.”
“Don’t even start with me,” the old woman groused. “I don’t want to get upset.”
“I’m just looking out for you, sister,” he said.
“I don’t have no money for the hormone pills,” she said, pushing her shopping cart back and forth from her spot on the bus shelter bench. “I don’t want to wear my shoes because I’m too hot because I don’t have my hormone pills.”
He stopped chiding her then. He just nodded in time with the rocking of the cart.
Chaos
September 14, 2009“I don’t understand why they named the C street Chaos,” she said, eying the sign three streets into Black Rock City. “How is Chaos part of Evolution?”
We looked at each other just long enough for it to sink in.
“Oh,” she said. “Oh, wow.”
Fell into planning
September 4, 2009“There was something in there about ‘The woman is the architecture for the baby,’ and it went on like that for several pages. I’m like, ‘Really, dude?’ I’m so glad I fell into planning.”
100 Proof 